Make Sure Your Parents Needs are Met

If you are hiring a care taker for the trip remember to stay at places that are handicap accessible to make it easier for your parent. If you are booking a room at an assisted living facility be sure that they know your parent’s needs.

Have a good and safe vacation!

East Texas Primary Voting By Senior Citizens

The Texas primary voting ends on March 4th at 7pm. Unfortunately there are many people taking advantage of the elderly in nursing homes or assisted living communities and stealing their votes. The Senior News in Arlington report “Nursing homes, notorious places for voter fraud, need greater guidance on how to help residents vote…About one in five votes in the 2004 presidential election was cast by someone 65 years or older. By 2040, it is anticipated about 40 percent of voters will be 65 or older. …John Karlawish, a professor of medicine and medical ethics at the University of Pennsylvania,…said much of the voting at the long term care facilities studied was done by absentee ballot, which is well recognized as a mechanism for voter fraud. ‘First, people decided whether they can vote, and second, people steal their votes.’”

Assist But Do Not Manipulate Your Senior Loved One

Make sure your loved one has the opportunity to vote if he or she desires. Educate mom and dad on what’s going on in politics now. They educated you when you were young. Bring them up to date on what’s going on in the news now and discuss how important it is to vote in the Texas primaries. If your parent is filling out an absentee ballot be sure you or someone you trust is helping them and not someone you don’t know even if the person seems like a sweet care giver. You can’t be too careful with voting.

When illness turns family members into caregivers there is often strong emotional experiences that the caregiver goes through.

Sadness: It is disturbing to see a loved one rendered physically helpless, particularly if the injury had a sudden onset. But the advent of cognitive deficits, causing changes in the patients personality and behavior, are generally found by researchers to be far more wrenching for families. When even so simple a task for the caregiver as sharing the events of one’s day and being understood is precluding by a patients dimentia, the loss of companionship is profound. Decreases in functioning, especially intellectual capacity, will often force patients who were working to retire, creating economical hardships for the family. When other family members shift to shoulder the bread-winning burden while also assisting the patient more at home with daily activities, they suffer dramamtically increased workloads and drastically reduced personal time. Some caregivers find relief in tears and take solace from sharing their mornful feelings with others who respond understandingly. Many caregivers however feel uncomfortable about expressing sadness and shame. They typicallycite several objections: 1-”I don’t want to feel sad because it will make me depressed.” 2-”I don’t want to express sadness because other people will think that I’m weak.” 3-”What do I have to feel sad about when I’m not the one who is disabled?” or 4-”I’m afraid that if I express sadness, it will make my loved one feel worse.” Generally though empathizing with the caregiver’s sadness is one of the most effective ways that a patient can give back something meaningful to the person who has made sacrifices on his behalf. When a caregiver is willing to take the risk of expressing sadness to a loved one in a non-blaming way, it most often results in a greater feeling of comunion or shared mission between the two that helps them both feel better understood and supported.

 Anger: Caregiver anger depends mostly on the relationship between the patient and the caregiver before the illness. At its simplest, it takes the form of blaming the patient for bringing the tragedy upon the family. The sting of being unjustly trapped often lies at the root of anger. Sometimes the anger isn’t toward the patient but at God. Anger must be dealt with promptly or it will turn into bitterness.

Worry: Every family member of one who is suffering worries. But a caregiver must be careful not to worry him or herself too much or he/she will get burned out.

Guilt: Many family members feel guilty that their loved ones have become ill as if it is their fault. A family member might feel guilty that he or she hasn’t visited a loved one in the nursing home. Also there may be guilt because a relationship went soar before the illness took place. It is never too late to love. Visit that family member in the nursing home. Start talking and praying for him or her.

As Father’s Day is soon approaching there are many ways to do or find something special for your senior citizen father. If your father is in an assisted living community or nursing home he’d probably enjoy a night out at his favorite restaurant. If a night out is not an option then bring something to him such as food, a gift, or a card. Give a gift that is meaningful and thought out. If your father is active give him a gift related to his hobbies or interest such as a sports memorabilia, a walking stick with a pattern on it, a video or CD with his favorite music.

If your father is not very active consider giving a gift that enables him to have a more enjoyable and easier life such as a magnifier for reading, a “lifter cushion”, a reacher, comfortable shoes or some clothes that are easy to get in and out of. If your father is living at home you could mow his lawn, clean the gutters, or any task that is hard to get around to doing. Above all father’s day gifts it’s important to tell your father how much he has meant to you. As father’s age they want to know that they lived a good life and were influential in the lives of their children. Tell your senior citizen father this father’s day how much of an influence he has had on you and how much you appreciate him.